It has been three years since I lost my hero, my mother Ruth Clemens.  She was a women that was very strong, loving and made the greatest impact on those around her.  She was that way until the very day she died.  My mother was born in Kentucky and grew up in a hallow called Sand Hill.  She lost her mother when she was very young and then her father when she was a young teen.  Despite her lose she remained strong, caring, and set the best of example.  

In 2004 they found my mother had Colon Cancer.  That was a devastating blow.  Her mother had died from Pancreatic Cancer which is very similar.  Her mother died though in her late forties or early fifties.  Mom had passed that, but I think in some ways she felt she would die near the same age.  She would never tell use that though.  After finding the cancer they removed something like 2 feet of her colon, removing with it the cancer.  Then it was a year of Chemo therapy and the cancer was gone. 

The next year saw her having a heart by-pass to help her out, but all was well.  The cancer had not returned, but with in the second year they found the spots.  Now the cancer was throughout her body.  She kept telling us, "It is not on any organs so it is ok." And for the next two years that is how we say it.  Just those nasty spots that made her need more Chemo therapy for.  The problem was they never went away.  They never got smaller.  They just stayed the same. 

At this time I am stationed in South Korea and my worst fear was she would die while I was there.  Flying home from there takes almost two days, so there is no rushing home to be by her side.  I feared I would not get a chance to say good by.  It was my last few days in South Korea.  I was being transferred to Fort Carson, Colorado.  Much closer to my mom in California.  I was due to leave on Monday, but on Friday I get the call - she is not doing well.  I struggled to get my flight moved up fearing the worst.  Fearing I would not get to say good by.

Good by was not needed just yet though.  I got home and yes my mother was sick.  Yes she was at her end, but she was alert enough to see me come through that door.  I was able to see that smile one last time.  It took her over a week to pass, but she went in her sleep.  It was as peaceful as it could be.  In her home, with her husband, and in her own way on her terms.

She was a fighter to the very end.  She would not tell me in the beginning, but when they first found the cancer the doctors gave her less than two years to live.  She would not listen to that though.  She would carry on being who she was.  The Bunko lady that through the Outhouse party!  The crazy mom that would go shoot pool with her boys and have a couple beers.  She was the neighborhood mom with several boys ending up staying at her house to get away from their crazy lives and pointed in a new direction to become successful men. 

She had a strong heart and an angle that sat on her shoulder.  No, maybe that is wrong.  She did have the strong heart, but I think she was the angel.  For two years she did her Chemo therapy.  For two years she went there with a smile on her face and the attitude as if she was getting her hair done.  She would walk around the hospital with her IV pole in one hand, a smile on her face and an easy way about her that would bring smiles to everyone.  That included those that were ready to give up the fight.  I was told one guy was ready to give the fight, but because of my mom he pushed on.  He could not give up while she was around.  That was my mom.  You could not quit with her around.

Well that is my story about my hero.  For the last three years I have missed her and there will only be many more years of missing her, but she is with me.  She is in my heart.  She is in everything I do.  To this day every time I see an elephant I know she is with me.  She collected elephants (figurines that is). So now when ever I see an elephant I know she is there.  My mother will not be forgot by those that knew her. 

Now that I have told you my story of my mother's struggle with cancer and her passing, tell us your story.  Lets celibate this Cancer Awareness month by telling stories of those we lost and how we remember them.  Use the comment box below to tell your story or your the contact form to email me your story and I will post it her.